4.9.22

New blog

Oh my goodness, I have a new blog and I love having a new blog!

http://mariahedmanart.com/

THANKS FOR CHECKING IN. STILL <3



17.1.21

Are you surprised

Hey haha. It's 2021!

Me and Dennis are engaged since 1st december 2019. I'm 2 years into residency in internal medicine opting to double in internal + infectious diseases. Dennis has done 1/5 years residency in radiology. 

Pandemic is still going at maximum speed. Had my dose of COVID in march last year which went by peacefully so I'm not planning on vaccination any time soon.

Can gladly say that I'm fitter and stronger than ever at 29 and thiiis close to my first muscle up. Not getting pregnant before I can do one lol. Kidding but not kidding? Honestly pregnancy scares me and I wish I'd feel a bit more ready by now because it's getting close. I want a January/February baby meaning I have to get pregnant in May/June... 2022? Would be nice to travel a bit more before etc but a pandemic hasn't been very helpful.

I like internal medicine a lot but it's tough. Having great colleagues at Danderyds sjukhus really helps. Amazed by how I've become so good at working 12 hour nightshifts without rest... my current trick is to work out at gym a few hours before, then have a good meal and nap prior, and to eat something every 1-2 hours through the whole night + sip on Coca Cola. Probably ages me at a 150% speed. How does this work for people with kids though!?

Spoke to Eleni this week, wow I miss my girls. We were supposed to meet up in San Diego April 2020 but yeah. Social life is poor at the moment and I can sadly admit that apart from our cancelled reunion there's no major difference to my social life now comparing to one year prior to COVID. Medschool WAS the BEST time of my life. Glad that I have this blog to look back at <3


NYE 20/21 at home with my love.

6.10.19

Updato potato

Heeyy! Thanks for checking in. I thought I'd share an update including my beloved pink coat, photos below are from today when Dennis and I took a stroll downtown. 

I'm not pregnant. I'm not engaged. Haha... and guess what, I'll be changing jobs. Not because I didn't like infectology, I love infectology and it has been the absolute funnest job I ever had until now. I'll let you know where I continue, it's not settled.

This year has been hard for several reasons and I haven't been as happy as I usually am.

I've made progress muscle-wise though, workouts have been great and I've barely even had a cold since my flu in January.

Also I have so many houseplants now, partly for therapy and I guess I simply got infected by the "plant trend" which I'm not sure has been acknowledged but there certainly is one.

I had a lovely day today!!! I'll try to check in soon again.

20.4.19

Commenting 20 confessions from 2013

I stumbled upon this list of "20 confessions" from 2013 that I thought would be fun to go through and comment on the way, to see my own reaction and to see if anything has changed.

- I'm shy unless I'm in a good mood - Still true. Even truer since I returned back to normal life vs. uni life.
- I have excel files with statistics on parameters in my life such as milk consumption, menstrual cycle ... etc. - WTF haha not anymore! I'm tempted though xD and I stopped drinking milk (except in coffee) after I measured my cholesterol levels... which are normal now.
- I only scored 100% on a test once in my life. It was in high school at math (Matte A) haha... - LOL I don't remember this at ALL! Glad that I wrote it down, otherwise I'd say that I can't remember a single time that I scored 100%.
- I was in love with Orlando Bloom when I was 13 and fantasised about how I was his girlfriend - Followed him on instagram recently...
- I think that I can't focus on one single thing for more than 15 minutes --15 minutes!? I'm down at what, 5 minutes now?
- 9/10 times I can't spell "exercise" without looking it up - Gotcha back Maria, exercised this one.
- I get anxious if I don't carry some sort of pocket mirror - Not anymore! Confidence? Two weeks ago though, I randomly met someone I didn't talk to in years, then when I got inside the elevator at home I saw that I had black pepper between my teeth. I wished I was still addicted to a pocket mirror.
- I like One Direction and play their Top 50 songs on YouTube sometimes - This one must have been a phase 
- I can't bitch. I would never win a battle hahaa - Hmm na I would lose big time.
- I love myself more than anything else --Still love myself a lot, but there are so many things and people that I also love...
- I have the general attitude that I can get any guy that I want, so if a cute guy is actually not interested I get awkwardly, internally confused and disappointed EVEN THOUGH I have a boyfriend just because the behaviour interferes with my exaggerated ego - WTF Maria xD
- I want to be a vegetarian but I'm allergic to both fish egg and nuts so it's a hopeless case... - I've implemented a tiny bit of veganism but yeah this really is a hopeless case
- I have been the slowest eater my whole life. I had to sit alone and eat in both kindergarden and early primary school because there was no point to wait for me to finish my food - on my last job (family medicine) in Stockholm I sat alone for 5 minutes almost every day finishing my food, making the first patient after lunch wait for me... oh god...
- I only use free foundation samples because I don't want to buy one since I don't want to start using foundation (??) - Girl, you got two foundations now, one for summer and one for winter. But you never covered your face with foundation, just spot concealing on bad days.
- One of my essential skin care products is scotch tape - My skin isn't as dry right now, but still quite true, I have scotch tape in my make up bags.
- I played almost exclusively with boys until I was 11 - today 80% of my friends are women
- If I have to throw away food I place it in the center of a huge bush when nobody sees so that some animal can eat it - aahh good habit. Will pick it up again if I live at an appropriate place (nearby a bush)
- I easily cry - a bit better today but still true
- I can leave worn clothes in piles on the floor for several days - No, NO.
- For many years, until two months ago, I set my clocks appx. 15 minutes ahead to help me arrive to places on time - NOOOOO hahaha how!? Why would anyone do this to themselves!!?

10.4.19

Up to the date

Ah yes.

I have three weeks off now in between jobs, and wanted to say Hi for a while now.

Me and Dennis actually really like it in Stockholm, living there has definitely exceeded my expectations. Best part of it is living 10 minutes away from Matilda!?

My 6 months at Clinical Immunology and transfusion medicine did not impress me however, maybe mainly because this area is a lab-specialty in Sweden.. which I've now learned isn't really my cup of tea. Although the cases that they handle there are rare, complex and super interesting, the work itself was often monotone and boring. 8-12 was usually packed without two seconds to breathe, whilst 12-16.30 consisted of filling in forms, phone calls and just waiting for the clock to tick... I even finished 15 points of Business economics during those afternoons (distance uni course) and still had time left to revise immunology, sit and think and feel tortured from not being able to go home haha. Stress is bad of course but I like challenges and want to feel busy. I want lots of patient contact and diagnostics. But I am also disappointed with my boss/es, in the end I don't feel like my efforts were appreciated, or that what I did was of value. Maybe it wasn't of particular value? Minimum one probably two young colleagues also talked badly about me, I didn't confront anyone because confrontation is not a wise move in Sweden... one of them didn't even write bye when I left lol. But most colleagues were super nice, especially the nurses <3 Wrong place for me guys! I am moving over to Infectious diseases which has been my number one goal since medschool... in the year book I wrote that I will specialize in "Infectology, Oncology or Family medicine" which I think was a damn accurate analysis of my future me, so far haha. In retrospect I'm often impressed by myself. Enough Maria, not everyone understand your humour - unfortunately this is a reflection that I now make after one year in Sweden where you can't really speak your mind unless what you say is mainstream. I'm even slightly hesitant to post this in case someone from work would use it against me somehow. I dare you :P

Want to know what I did today? I went to gym with my dad, I drove to Eskilstuna yeh I got a licence now. My dad has a driving ban (? is this the right word) because unfortunately he had a stroke/brainstem infarction in January. Oh my god it was the worst that has ever happened in my life. All in all the fact that we are now going to gym together, less than three months later is a miracle which can't be measured in words. Today I also hmmm started a new painting and made HAHA HAD TO INTERRUPT MY WRITING CUS A BADGER WAS EATING PRIVET'S FOOD OUTSIDE anyways also made Kimchi this evening which I tried once before in medschool but that turned out way too spicy like coagulative necrosis bleach your intestines, but this time..!

So a lot can happen in six months. I just finished 5 weeks of family medicine in Stockholm, had more fun than I did for half a year at immuno. I am not un-nervous about starting infectology because of my first experience at KS but I look forward to it so so much. The doctor group seems to be 1-2 school classes large and I look forward to finding some friendliness and new challenges there. My boss also seems like a cool lady.

See ya later!

14.10.18

Another one!

Yesterday Dennis and I signed a contract to buy an apartment in Stockholm, and we are moving in in less than a month. What!! I am SO relieved and I'm sooo happy with the apartment.

I said this blog will close after I finish medschool and it's been over a year and we're still here lol. What happened to my new blog and stuff? The new website? Haha I don't know... but if anything changes I'll let you know... since we're buying an apartment we are not starting our business/corporation in the coming months I think, for economical reasons, I mean we're gonna afford like one piece of furniture per month to the apartment. So no business = no reason to launch our business website... But I don't even want the blog to be connected to the business at the moment...

Ah dear readers, what are you doing here. I can see you dropping in, I just wonder who you are! And why so many visitors from Israel? :P

Speaking of dropping, today I decided that I'm not moving on with my patent-thingy. Another burden off my shoulders. Although I wish a similar patent didn't already exist so I could get rich :)))))) but me and Dennis have other plans for our future business. Whoever (few ppl) patented similar stuff before me though, you guys suck. You had it for over 10 years and still no product on the market.

Fall photos from today yay! By the way it was 20 degrees C. Not sure if that's reasonable for October 13th but thanks I'm truly thankful.

26.9.18

Ackurato

AAaaa Hi!

To those who still look around now and then - How you doin?

How I'm doin?

WELL. I'm working in Stockholm, sixth week now, currently doing my rotation at the Apheresis-clinic. I don't want patients to find me on Google so that's why I'm not giving a more accurate description. Not that I think they care about me as much as when I was doing family medicine, but still. But yes I'm basically spending the day next to plasmapheresis, stem cell harvests... things as such. Will I continue specializing here - very possible. (the speciality includes much more than just apheresis but this is the first block of rotation) Possibilities to do research are seemingly veeery good... and oh my! In the spring I may be able to start seeing patients with immune deficiencies. So so cool.

I'm commuting, it's alright, better than I thought. I eat breakfast and do 50% of my make up on the train haha. A few passengers are eating but why is no one else doing their make up? Hallå? Heh.

But, but, but, tut, tut, tut, me and Dennis ARE looking for an apartment in Stockholm. To move there. Together. Not sure that I want to live in Stockholm that much... but I want to give this specialty a shot... and as long as I live with Dennis I am happy.

Pics from our fishing adventures early this summer. I was pretty buff returning from Finland, having spent all my spare time at the gym there haha. I lost like half of those muscles over the summer because I was only doing home workouts + cardio, but I'm back at it.


26.5.18

What's up yaa

Hi! Wow, I feel so good. Been home for a few weeks now... I have no problems. I am actually a person that rarely feel like I have problems... If there is a solution, a problem isn't a problem. HOW INTRIGUING! I was reading this blog today and I'm so happy that I have it, to look back at. And damn, I never realised how hot I was, haha, have to try and appreciate myself more in the moment and not only two-four years later.

It felt so pleasing to read about old memories, so I'm going to share what I did today, in service of my future me. Today I spent a few hours by the water, we're having an insane spring/summer in Sweden this year by the way. In the evening I practiced driving with my father until I got frustrated (at back-parkering..), ran 6,5 kilometres and made Pho soup. Yeeeh.

1. When did you wake up today? 9.50 AM

2. Who did you spend at least two hours with today? My father :)
3. How tall are you? 172 cm
4. The latest movie you saw? At cinema, about Utöya
5. How to impress you? be intelligent and fit and hot at the same time? How superficial am I? xD
6. What is your eyecolour? Medium brown
7. Do you like politics? Yes I like politics
8. What is your favourite location? My family's house on the countryside



9. Which is your least favourite location? I'm trying to think of a location that I dislike! Maybe Odlarskolan? Unpleasant memories from the school where I went in 7th grade.
10. Where do you think that you are in 10 years? Woow I will be 36... I think me and Dennis will live in a house... in Stockholm or Eskilstuna?? Some other city in Sweden? My GOD that feels so old.
11. What scared you as a child? Homeless people and dogs xD
12. What made you laugh hard recently? I visited Jasmine and Jacob in Gdansk last week and laughed for three days straight <3



13. Do you sleep with clothes on? Only if I really have to. In the winter usually or my butt gets cold...
14. Do you have any piercings? I have 5 in my ears. I want more!! But I'm scared. Haha.
15. Which cities have you lived in? Eskilstuna, Debrecen, Jakobstad
16. Favourite icecream? Stracciatella with VERY crushed chocolate like extremely small and lots of it
17. Favourite dessert? Classic swedish birthday cake haha ehh I've baked four this year already just to eat the cake myself....
18. Do you like coffee? I love myself a latte. I continuosly waste money on coffee on-the-go... love it so much...
19. What do you drink for breakfast? Water and coffee
20. Do you want children? Yes! At least 2, maybe 3.
21. What languages do you speak? Swedish, Russian, English... medical Hungarian
22. What do you spend your money on? Right now... I'm seemingly starting a company... but the past year I've spent money on jewellery and travelling.
23. Do you prefer calling or texting? I don't knooow, texting??
24. Do you curse? Period-wise, I have a period now with increased cursing hehe
25. Do you snore? I do lol.
26. How many relationships have you been in? Two
27. Are you good at math? I'm decent at spontaneous math and calculating in my head, and had top grades in primary school, but I kind of stopped developing there and only got a "pass" in math in high school
28. How often do you work out? The past weeks on average 4-5 days per week, so less compared to the past year.


29. What is the biggest scar on your body? Inside my heart. JK on my left knee from ACL-reconstruction.
30. Do you like tattoos? No, I don't like them :) but I saw one like yesterday that I somehow liked? This was a unique moment for me!


15.4.18

Meanwhile

Ah, I downloaded the wordpress stuff but didn't set it up yet, also I don't know what my new blog domain is going to be? And should I connect it to my professional webside or no!??!? I reached the conclusion that I need to start a corporation in case I get my patent thingy patented.. and also I'm going on a course for botox injections in May... was thinking I could do botox injections on the side, as a side income I mean. Let me know if you want to get treated! I'll set up discounts for my readers! Haha.

At the moment I'm in Finland, all alone, got four more weeks here. Since neither Dennis nor none of my friends are here right now I literally have nothing to do on my spare time but gymming, so I've signed up to work evening shifts at the ER about every second day, this week I have four shifts. It sucks and time goes by so fast it's sad. By the way my "boss" at the ER is looking for doctors, so if anyone is interested in working at a small, general ER in the Swedish speaking part of Finland, message me.

Oh oh. All in all, alone and all, I am still pretty happy. This winter felt soooo long, the sun rays and 10 degrees celcius here mean everything to me right now.

Speaking of 10, another thing, my skin hasn't been this clear for over a month, in 10 years. I hope my pimple days are over for all eternity. Actually I started using a face wash with salicylic acid from Aco about five weeks ago, after my brothers recommendation, and I don't think it is a coincidence that my skin has been clearer since then, we're talking 10 years. It's just a face wash!! I'm so grateful.

17.3.18

Hello

Hiiiiii. I miss blogging. I think that if I start it again, it will be at a new platform or at least a new adress. Medschool is a closed chapter. I've altered the sidebar here as you may see.

What happened since October 3rd? I've been working in Finland, appx. 60% as a GP and 40% at the emergency. I am currently on a 5 week long break from work, the purpose of this was to learn how to drive - which I planned to do in Debrecen, I really planned it MONTHS back but once I arrived there, the driving school wanted pocket money and I dropped this idea pretty quickly and went on a trip to Israel with Dennis. Now I'm back home in Sweden, I still have another 3 weeks off from work and gonna try and use these for driving classes here in Sweden instead hahah.

What else happened. Dennis and I are still together and he is starting pre-residency in Surgery, in April. My patent-thingy... submitted that. Not sure if my idea can be patented but we shall see what happens to my application in the coming year... As for work, I'm leaving Finland and starting work in Sweden in May this year, at first as a GP in Flen, 20 minutes from my family's house on the countryside... and then...... I AM starting pre-residency at clinical immunology at Karolinska in August. Really!!! I found out yesterday and I am so happy........

The only picture I have from Israel on my laptop is a bikini picture, goes so well with the career content in this post. My phone is dead with all photos inside and I forgot my new-tech-USB-charger in Eskilstuna (the town where I grew up, my family still has an appartment there). I wonder if my fitness pics will ever be brought up in my career, doctors are somehow so exposed.

I had so much random positive feedback regarding my blog these past months, I just want to say thank you for reading and appreciating and I am just glad?? that my diary was relaxing reading for someone, or even amusing, or even that some have found it helpful or supporting through medical school... <3

3.10.17

What is going to happen to this blog?

I don't know, this blog was my diary during my struggle through medical school. I've had some sort of digital diary ever since I was 12 - 13 I think... some of you have seen my previous one from primary and high school, hahah. Heddelande, I will keep it here right where it is, but I feel like a large chapter of my life has ended, and this blog is part of that chapter...

What should I do? Should I start a new blog? Will I even keep writing if I start a new blog? Do I want to? Do I have time? Will Instagram suffice instead? Why am I not getting new followers on Instagram!? Should I create a professional website, connected to a personal blog, is that good for business?

What do I want with my life? No time to waste, I should start preparing for that right now.

Here look at my recent buffness.

I should post graduation pics

M.D. degree, it's here. Now joining doctors without licenses for a while. Starting work in Finland in November, meanwhile taking it easy back home, but also going to visit Dubai and Reykjavik a bit... and have some fractionated laser done on my face... kind of not looking forward to the latter, can you imagine...

I didn't say goodbye to a lot of friends before I left Debrecen, maybe because I can't realise that I have actually left. Sorry, I hope that I will meet you all again. I love you. Should I write a bye-message on Facebook? Are people still on Facebook nowadays? I love Debrecen, I loved being a student there... I loved group 11 and I loved pretty much everything apart from the Stomatology exam in 4th year (which I didn't even fail).


17.8.17

Oh dear!

The summer is coming to an end!? I finished my exams by the end of June, worked at the oncology ward in Eskilstuna for 5 weeks, spent some time with family and friends (and exercised of course ...) and now, at last, although I haven't been longing for it - there's only the Hungarian state examination left before I graduate and get my medical doctor degree. Ho-ly shit!

I have many goals for the coming year which is the main reason to why I've now bought a laptop. My tablet will no longer be enough, I have plans. Today I realised that I didn't stop by at my blog in ages... so if anyone is still out there reading, hi! And whoever implied in the comments that I have a(/multiple?) personality disorder, feel free to educate me further on the matter, how have you perceived me?

Once, when I messaged Leo taxi (airport shuttle service for students in Deb), and signed my message at the bottom, the driver showed up flashing a find-me-sign saying "SINCERELY MARIA".

SINCERELY, MARIA


15.5.17

Floral

Ohhh I love being back in Hungary, I love everything about it. Kind of had a shitty day due to personal issues but temperature has been over 20, lots of sun and yesterday I finally saw Bendy and Eleni over dinner and drinks. Missed them so so soo much. And finally I can wear my new denim jacket, can you guess how long I've been waiting for thease days...

Tomorrow I have to turn in my lecture book at the neurology department, again, and get that signature so that I can take the neurology exam... next week... eeek.

2.5.17

Because it's time to study

Helllloo.

We're at our last days here in Jakobstad right now, and we finally had the last bit of snow for a while, I deeply hope so. Leaving this place with experience, paleness, money, and satiety for cardiology. Infection and oncology is taking the lead for options, I also like emergency medicine and surgery... But the lifestyle.. Not sure! Probably exhausting in a more physical way. Will I find a specialty which feels 100%?

What else? Moscow was lovely, and cold, and gorgeous. City centre is soooo beautiful, unfortunately not so much on the outskirts. Saw most of my relatives there which I'm really thankful for. Want to go back soon again.

What else? Dennis is the best. Except for when we argue, I'm the best no protest.

I am so, so, so excited to go back to Debrecen in a few weeks. Friends, CLIMATE, a life basically haha.


15.4.17

GLAD PÅSK

Semesteeer! Easter! I'm at home for a few days, tomorrow me and mom are going to Moscow. Haven't been there for six years!! Such a shame, but at last. It's going to be quite cold apparently, around zero degrees. By now (after six months of winter) I suppose zero degrees is going to feel warm-ish. We had absolutely lovely weather today though, I ran hill-intervals for 30 minutes and did a few exercises. Privet was my spectator.

By the way, I gained almost three kilos?? Since January. That's a LOT for me, I only weighed over 60 kilos once before, in high school when I was "fat" from high alcohol consumption heh heh. I've been pushing harder at the gym ever since I realised that I'm not going to be a lazy gymmer no more, which clearly works. I can do pistol squats now hehee... but I probably gained some fat too :)

23.3.17

Tick tox

Alas, here is a moment I cannot miss out on. I'm off from work today, currently on the train on my way home from Helsinki. I've applied for a Visa to Russia yehyeh, hopefully travelling to visit my grandmother and other close relatives in April. Sooo looking forward to it... Nothing can go wrong with the application pretty pleeease.

Shopped for a tiny bit of makeup too hihi. Wow Helsinki is amazing for makeup, but crazy expensive.

I'm legit exhausted, have been up since 4AM. It takes 4 hours to go from Jakobstad to Helsinki. Sweet dreams on me. Tomorrow back to work. The photo of me and Dennis between streets of Helsinki, is from last week.


6.3.17

Howhowhow

Lone no more! <3 Life and work goes on over here. And gym of course, duh. Today I worked my first extra-shift at the emergency after my standard working day at the cardiology department. Total 8.00 - 21.30. I need the experience, but working over 12 hours like that is not worth the money... How do some people live their life continuously like this? That is the question.


19.2.17

Sincerely

I'm socially exhausted, in a very lonely way. I go to work, mostly have lunch alone, work over-time because I'm so slow with paperwork... spend two hours at the gym, eat and sleep. Oh and shop online.

I'm a social animal, really. I need my giggle, attention and gossip. Dennis has been away for two weeks and it is well enough. Saw Dollal and Nora this weekend for a fika, yay, but I can't live off a 50 minute fika! Spoke with my mom on the phone for some hour. How am I going to socially survive when medschool is over? What is going to happen!? Dennis, we must never be apart, you are stuck with me. DENNIIIIIS.

I'm almost speaking to strangers at the gym. And gym really saves me by the way. The feeling after exercise, as right now, oh it's so good... and I've noticed on occasions when I haven't exercised for two or three days, like during exams or travelling or viruses for instance... that I get angry! Mad and insulting things and people in my head, haha. I wonder if that is a deficiency of something, like some sort of withdrawal... or an excess of something waiting to be consumed.

Bla bla bla! Well I don't have a social life, so where else would I share it.

By the way, I ordered these tights from Gymshark. I have their flex leggings from before which may be the most comfortable gym tights I've ever owned. So eventually I got these too, but I actually ordered cropped ones, capris... they sent me full length by mistake. So I wrote an email, and they sent me new capris and let me keep these. That is actually really good service, no wonder Gymshark is becoming a big brand quickly. This model is not nearly as comfortable as the flex leggings though. These are a bit too short on me and tend to ride down around the crotch area, like most tights do in my opinion. Now I have two pairs, they look good but I wouldn't order more colours. Bla bla bla :)

10.2.17

Merrell in my H

My phone camera can take decent pics at times, but oh not today - beware of extraordinary picture quality.

Learned a lot this week. Spent 3,5 days at the cardiology department and 1,5 days at the ER. Usually I don't sleep well when I'm feeling stressed, but... well firstly I have been mentally exhausted before bedtime... but the stress at work doesn't make me anxious, like a big exam does for instance, rather excited... scared sometimes but, I saw and treated a neurotic angioedema yesterday, how rare and cool is that!!

I've been to gym Tue, Wed, Fri this week so far - not bad. Can't wait to go tomorrow. My new shoes are minimum cushioning "barefoot feel" running shoes. Oh, oh, oh, this is exactly what I've been looking for. So glad that I din't go with Nike again. My previous Nike Free Run 5,0 were also pure love... but I needed new shoes, and the updated Free Run's are squishier and softer... I rather wanted something stiffer, as close to barefoot-feel as possible, and found these from Merrell. Hell, I have no idea of the name of the shoe, all I remember is a strange name, too advanced for it's own good. Hard, ergonomic shoes strengthens the bones and muscles of the foot, and give more knee stability (no wiggle to the sides), thus also great for weightlifting. And these are 10/10 comfortable. PEACE.