write-off / fcked up

Hey guys. Don't read this if you're feeling really happy because it will probably bring down your mood.

I feel miserable, wish I could let my thoughts go. Central: I'm alone. Probably wouldn't have been this sad if it wasnt for things like that I thought my parents died last night, when I read in the news about a car accident right by my family's summer house where a man and a woman got crushed under a truck. Or like those two air plane crashes in USA, or the huge oil explosion in Canada. Or the psycho maniac in Sweden who went around pulling doorhandles to enter and stab people; a woman left the door unlocked to her appartment when she went to check the laundry and her 18 year old son, who was sleeping in his bed, got stabbed in his face and neck. He also murdered an 84 year old woman and another 43 year old man got stabbed too. Or the surgeon in Russia who got angry at his patient and hit him on his head and chest, after the patient had had an open-chest surgery. The patient died a couple of days later.

I'm especially affected by the crash in San Fransisco, because out of all the survivors, those who had the most serious injuries were sitting in the back of the plane... and I always sit in the back of the plane... I know right, wth am I thinking? And I'm scared that I'm not going to pass my physio exam this week, although a more realistic thought would be to know that I'm going to finish this semsester. I feel STUPID for being anxious when I'm not the person who's having my world being torn apart! While I'm here cramming physiology (which is a privilege) people are truly suffering and their life will never be the same. And I have everything that I could ever wish for. I hate how unfair life can be and there's nothing worse than PEOPLE actively inflicting damage to other beings.

Sorry for making you read such a depressing post. Maybe I should delete this one.
Take care. And to those of you who still have exams, best of luck.

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